In yet another set of survey results that surely tells us all we need to know about the state of our great nation, British youngsters innocently state that Sir Winston Churchill was the first man to walk on the moon, the Telegraph smirks.

Befuddled tykes, aged between four and ten, confused the iconic and eerily baby-faced WWII PM with the iconic and completely forgettable-faced Neil Armstrong, who did the lunar-shuffle four years after Churchill's death.

The results of the survey, commissioned by Walt Disney Studios Home Entertainment in cahoots with the rather more respectable Royal Astronomical Society, sadly suggest that primary school children are perhaps not getting the proper grounding in science they need.

Other sobering results included a third of kids expressing the belief that Earth is not officially a planet. Where Churchill was concerned, the association appeared to be with a talking nodding insurance dog.

Reassuringly, though, the survey did indicate that children are eager to replace their mental ragbag of Wikipedia-grade unfacts with greater knowledge of astronomy. The first step for teachers on this path to youngster-enlightenment must surely be to explain the many and significant differences between Sir Patrick Moore and Mr Jonathan Cainer, Esq. ®

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