"Stay vigilant, and try not to look like a tin of dog food."

What? Can dogs use tin openers too?

I knew a rottweiler once who taught himself to shotgun beer cans by chasing them round the room for a bit with his nose and then biting into them, so I don't think a tin opener is strictly necessary.

Only if they have sensitive triggers... (the tin-openers that is... not the dogs)

I see your girlfriends are of the same high quality as ever....

I'm sure that Ian wasn't using the word "knew" in the biblical sense there.

Pretty sure.